Mindful Drinking and Moderation in Midlife: How to Drink Less, On Your Terms
**A Spotify 'Rising Star' show** Practical moderation for the way you want to live.
Why can't I drink like I used to? How do I drink less without quitting completely? Should I go for low, no or light alcohol drinks? Why do alcohol-free drinks cost so much?
If you're in your 30s, 40s, 50s or beyond and asking these questions, this is your podcast.
Welcome to the essential show for midlife adults who want to drink less, on their own terms—without the pressure to quit completely, follow rigid rules, or label themselves as sober.
I'm Denise Hamilton-Mace, your mindful drinking mentor, writer and public speaker on all things low, no and light. Each week, I help stressed parents and busy midlife adults navigate their relationship with alcohol through practical approaches grounded in real-world experience and behaviour change strategy, not willpower or wellness culture
What you'll get:
Mindful Moderation Solo Episodes – Deep-dives answering the questions that matter to sophisticated drinkers who want to moderate smartly:
- How do I cut back when my partner still drinks at home?
- What really works: willpower vs. strategy?
- Why do premium alcohol-free drinks cost the same as full-strength versions?
- How do I navigate social situations when I'm the only one moderating?
This podcast is for you if:
- You're looking for practical advice that fits your demanding life, not another wellness overhaul
- You recognise that coasting with mid-strength drinks, zebra-striping, or bookending your evening with something non-alcoholic are all valid strategies
- You want better mornings without giving up celebrating life's special moments
This isn't about going completely dry or reinventing yourself. It's about keeping energy for what matters most: family, health, career, and living life on your own terms.
Join the moderation revolution happening in midlife – because while Gen Z gets the headlines, you're the one actually doing it.
Mindful Drinking and Moderation in Midlife: How to Drink Less, On Your Terms
#19. You Don't Have to be An Alcoholic to Rethink Your Drinking
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It’s time to stop beating around the bush and get real with yourself. Giving yourself time to assess your relationship with alcohol is not just the purview of the disordered drinker.
You don’t have to wait until you’re in a ‘troubled’ relationship with grog; in fact, you don’t even need to wait for a hangover; all you need is to really assess what alcohol is bringing to your life vs what it’s taking away.
Once you’ve done your own personal accounting, you’ll be ready to start thinking about what you can do to make your relationship with alcohol, and, therefore, your life, better on your own terms.
In this solo episode, you get to hear some of my own story, what motivated me to make a change and some of the thought processes that help us act in our own best interests when it comes to booze.
No judgment, no rules, no expectations – let’s just have a chat.
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✅ Get the Beginner's Guide to Mindful Drinking - https://lownodrinker.com/mindful-drinking-beginners-guide/
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❓ Take the Midlife Drinking Triggers Quiz - https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/68dd33385bb4a20015996a13
Hi hi , lono Nation Another shorty episode today . In truth , the reason why I do sometimes make shorter episodes is because I'm in the middle of trying to get the next issue of the Lono Drinker magazine ready for you , and it is coming out in at the time of recording about 10 days or so , but that means I need to get it to the printers in time .
Alcohol use disorder and you (or not)
Speaker 1So today I'm doing a solo recording for you because I wanted to have a chat about something that I think really needs to be addressed , so that you members of Low no Nation can understand that there is no pressure and no expectation on you when it comes to changing your relationship with alcohol on your own terms , and that is the misunderstanding that you need to be , or consider yourself to be , someone who's suffering from alcohol use disorder , to want to look at your relationship with alcohol . Now , to clarify , alcohol use disorder is the new terminology that is used to describe somebody who we used to previously call an alcoholic , and that's because it has been discovered , through many interviews and investigations and speaking to people who are living with this condition , that there is a spectrum of alcohol use disorder . It is not a case of I drink and I'm completely fine with it and I drink , and I'm an absolute raving alcoholic . There are people that live all along that spectrum in all different manners when it comes to their alcohol consumption .
Speaker 1Me personally , because I worked in hospitality for so long , alcohol was always a part of my life , and I mean daily . Whether I was working or not , everything I did involved alcohol or revolved around alcohol . Was I a raging alcoholic ? No , did I have an issue with my alcohol consumption ? At times , most definitely yes . At other times , not so much . And so it's not a case of you need to define yourself as somebody who is suffering from alcohol use disorder or define yourself as an alcoholic to want to turn around and go . Am I actually enjoying this drink as much as I used to Do ? I actually feel like I want to consume alcohol the way that I did .
Thought process
Speaker 1You know it's perfectly okay to sit back and go . I'm not an alcoholic . It's not affecting my life in any major detrimental way . I've still got a job . I've still look after the kids and do their packed lunch . I still have a lovely social life on the weekend , I still have all my hobbies and I go for a run , but I'm feeling the effects of alcohol and I'm wondering if , if I didn't drink as much , would I be feeling better . And it's okay to have those thoughts and it's good to investigate them , because your answer might be yes . Your answer might be that actually yeah . Do you know what ? If I didn't get absolutely rat ass every weekend , then I could do even more throughout the week . Or your answer might be do you know what ? I still really enjoy drinking and I still really enjoy the flavor of my favorite Merlot . Or you know , I absolutely love my old fashions .
Speaker 1And so you decide that perhaps you just want to look at a way to cut back a little bit . I'm not a coach and I'm not a psychologist and I'm not a trained recovery professional , recovery professional . I can only speak from my own personal experience and the experiences of the people that I have been gathering around me and the stories I've been listening to when I interview people for the podcast or for the magazine , when I just talk to people when I'm out , and I can tell you categorically that there is no one size fits all , there is no definitive way to look at your relationship with alcohol . Yes , there are people out there who will tell you that no amount of alcohol is good for you . The World Health Organization has made a clear statement that no amount of alcohol is considered safe . And yet there are other people out there , in professional or medical field , who will tell you that they've done studies and they've seen studies that show that some amounts of this and some amounts of that can actually be good for you . The most important thing is that you have a look at how it's impacting you . Forget everybody else , don't listen to what anyone else has to say , listen to yourself , listen to your body , listen to your mind , listen to your heart
Listen to yourself
Speaker 1and think about how you're feeling when you've had those drinks . Are you enjoying them ? Are they adding to your enjoyment of your night out , of your meal , of your time with the people that you love ? Are you making decisions that you're proud of ? Are you doing things that fulfill you and make you happy and give you the life that you want ? The next day , are you feeling just a little bit ratty and like , oh God , I had a lot to drink last night ? Or are you feeling regretful of the choices that you made because it's impacting what you want to do with the rest of your day ? What you want to do with the rest of your day ? Is it affecting you just the next morning or is it impacting you further down the line ?
Speaker 1In my own life , I found that not only did I have really bad hangovers but that's something I had for years but also I found that once the hangover was over the initial obvious being ill and having a headache and feeling dehydrated once all of that was over , I found that still , three or four days later , there was still this residual niggling , not feeling quite myself , operating at like 60% capacity . I didn't recognize it until I actually really cut back on my drinking . And then , when I had a drink then and it took me four days to actually get back to feeling 100% I realized , oh my God , actually alcohol is having a much longer impact on me than I had realized
A promise to myself
Speaker 1. My entry into living a life less intoxicated was a promise I made to myself . It wasn't a case of hitting rock bottom . I'm not in recovery . I've never called myself an alcoholic .
Speaker 1I just got to the stage where I realized that I couldn't be dealing with the hangovers anymore and one day I made a promise to myself that I never , ever , ever want to have a hangover again . I didn't say I was never going to drink again . I didn't do that sort of you know , we've all done that Monday morning . Oh my God , I'm never drinking again . It wasn't one of those , it was much more . A case of this is just crap , this is not fun and it just became to the stage where it wasn't worth the few hours of fun for a night out to have a few days of just feeling subpar and it was affecting my mood . I was just cranky and I wasn't a nice wife and I wasn't a patient mum and those things are important to me .
Speaker 1And now that I have something that I'm building , something that I want to focus my time and my energy on when it comes to having a drink because I do still taste alcohol , obviously I've got tons of low and no drinks around me , but sometimes if I'm judging or if I'm looking for for new ingredients for things , and I will taste and compare alcohol to non-alcoholic drinks , my husband still drinks so he might say to me I'll taste this , it's really interesting . But I do know now that when I do that , when I taste it , I'm like , okay , right , I'm going to have a taste , that's it , that's fine and I don't want to have any more because I don't want to have to spend three days trying to get myself back into a good place , because I know how it affects me have your hangover and then , 24 hours later , you're absolutely done . But think about those 24 hours . Was there something that you'd rather do than lying in bed feeling like well shit , or is it that your body is starting to feel the effects much longer ? We're not spring chickens anymore .
Speaker 1Obviously , this channel and this podcast is for anybody of any age who wants to look at their relationship with alcohol , but I know that a lot of you out there will be similar to me . I just turned 45 yesterday and my body cannot cope with the drinking the way it did 20 years ago . I don't know anybody who can , particularly if you were a child of the 90s and going hell for leather , as a lot of us did 90s and going hell for leather as a lot of us did . So my point is that you don't have to consider yourself to be in trouble with alcohol to want to look at how you can reduce it in your life
No rules
Speaker 1. There are no expectations , there are no rules around what you think is best for you , and that's why I love the Sober , curious and Mindful movement .
Speaker 1It's not about telling people about the evils and the perils of alcohol . You're a grown-up . You already know that alcohol isn't good for you . But it's about helping people to recognise that there are other choices . There are other drinks , there are other ways of socialising , there are other things you can do with your time other than just getting drunk and just having a hangover . And
Take back the power of choice
Speaker 1if you do decide that you want to have a drink and you want to keep alcohol as part of your life , then that's fine . That is your choice . Just make sure that you give yourself every best opportunity to make the most of your life and to take back the power of choice from alcohol .
Speaker 1Don't put yourself in a position where you have one glass of wine , so you might as well get the bottle , so you might as well get another one , and before you know it , the choice is out of your hand . Things are snowballing , there's people dancing on bars , it's all going crazy , phone calls are being made , it's 3am in the morning and you can't get a taxi . Take back the power of choice . Drink mindfully , drink consciously and make sure that if you're choosing to drink , it really is giving you something that's worth what it's taking away from you . That's it from me this week . I hope you found this shorter episode really helpful and motivational and inspiring . Don't forget to hit subscribe wherever you are listening or watching and to check out Lono Drinker magazine . Issue eight will be out and ready for you in just a few days . Until next time , guys , happy drinking , bye .
